Exceeding Fantasy

Your dominance
Powerfully sexy
Strength of intrigue
Gravity pulling
Across Your lap
Desired beautifully
Sinfully sweet
Sparked electricity
Written in Your poetry
Lust
Greed
Just tell me
Did reality
Exceed
Your fantasies

His Words

His words
Tinted seductively
Full bodied
Aroma thick
Encompassing me

Between the lines
Dappled desire
Melting hues
Vivid intimacy

I spiral

On the edge of my lips
In shades of pink
Whispering

“I am yours”

Adoptee

🖤
You did
You always have
Countless moments
New mom and dad
An eternity not sufficient enough
To realize the greatness you posses
A measurement doesn’t exist to capture all that you give
Unconditional love
A selfless gift
Adoption
What it means
From an adoptee

Deserted

I wander quietly on a deserted beach

Tides of emotions caress me

Love crashing against the sea

Bitter chill in the breeze

A million thoughts

Questioning everything

🖤

The truth

It was real

It’s done

Heartache’s silent embrace

Gift of Finality


Alone

Which version do you prefer me to be?

The me that doesn’t always suit you quite so perfectly

The me that fits your perception of who I should be

The me who never has moments of weakness that brings me to my knees

It is difficult trying to be who everyone wants me to be

One day I’m going to only have myself to please

I reach out for your hand, repeatedly waiting just for someone to understand

Love me

Hate me

There is no in between

I understand though because I feel the same things

I’ve spent my whole life just trying to breathe

Still to this day I run, I hide, driving around aimlessly in an attempt ignore the brokenness that is inside

The only thing I really need is someone to listen and comfort the pieces that are me

I know they say love comes with a cost Maybe I’m just tired of feeling so damn lost

Not feeling accepted has taken a toll on me

Devastation added on top of the underlying pain

Nothing I can do but sit holding no one accountable

What else would you expect me to do

I turn it all inside

Carrying all the burdens

Hiding all the shame

Running from the memories

At the end of the day I have no one to blame

It’s ok though because I know that pain

I feel invisible

Nothing to lose

Oh wait, that’s right

That’s when I get told I don’t have a clue

I wonder if I’ve ever really showed anyone who I really am

My broken pieces run far to deep

Inside my demons constantly keeping me from sleep

Continually re-victimized by the very same voices that keep feeding me lies

Just when I feel I can’t hold on one more day, it occurs to me that no one is coming to save me and it doesn’t even matter if I were to walk away

All the labels and judgment

Fill my ears

But again no one knows the shell of a woman standing in front of them

Too sensitive

Too bossy

Too picky

Too upset

Too cautious

Too angry

Too hurt

Too organized

Too right

Too wrong

Too isolated

Too weak

Too strong

Too emotional

Too tired

Too sexy

Too much

Too difficult

Too quiet

Too old

Too kind

Too loud

Too thoughtful

Too busy

Too hyper

Too complicated

Too Broken

Surrounded by all the voices

Seeming so intrigued

Fascinated by my words & wisdom

They like me

They love me

Oops once again I’ve been misled

They were only passing the time

And never again thought of me

Have you ever truly felt this alone?


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It’s Me


A desperate yearning
Emotions run deep
Soulful intensity
Reminiscent of the greatest love stories

Complete serenity
Happiness
Love and empathy
Truth and sincerity
Judgment free
Words led by compassion
Actions reflecting honesty


Am I searching for something that doesn’t exist?

Am I even capable of recognizing it?

Void of ability
The truth
It’s probably me

Embracing numbness
Forcing it away
Too fearful of rejection
Expecting you to leave
Bracing for it
Ruining this
Keeping you close
Not letting you in completely
Hypocrisy speaking

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