I am incredibly honored to have 3 pieces selected for inclusion in the anthology, Screaming from the Silence
@vociferouspress @nightandsparrow
Stanzas from the Silence – poetry
Stories from the Silence – prose
Sketches from the Silence – visual art
Quietly watching
Anticipating
I wander
Lost in thought
Desperately hoping
For the peace
That eludes me each night
Continually seeking
For something
I have yet to find
In the antelucan hour
Between the darkness and light
I find beauty
Struggling
An internal battle
Acceptance
Forgiveness
Yesterhurt reminders
Stealing my time
Shadowing light
I continue
Fighting
The war inside
Forged artistry
Blazing creativity
Hammering relief
Sculpting beauty
Pressed intensely
Distorted memories
Exposed melancholy
Bending purposely
Spilling emotions
In each piece
A
R
T
Infused with
G
R
I
E
F
Creative therapy
Melancholy breeze
Barefoot on the beach
Tear kissed cheeks
Ocean serenading
Sunshine shadowing doubt
Cast out to sea
Drifting tides of memories
Her life was worthy
But she couldn’t see
Washed away
A forgotten journey
Seeking peace
#mentalhealth #youarenotalone @800273TALK #hope
Which version do you prefer me to be?
The me that doesn’t always suit you quite so perfectly
The me that fits your perception of who I should be
The me who never has moments of weakness that brings me to my knees
It is difficult trying to be who everyone wants me to be
One day I’m going to only have myself to please
I reach out for your hand, repeatedly waiting just for someone to understand
Love me
Hate me
There is no in between
I understand though because I feel the same things
I’ve spent my whole life just trying to breathe
Still to this day I run, I hide, driving around aimlessly in an attempt ignore the brokenness that is inside
The only thing I really need is someone to listen and comfort the pieces that are me
I know they say love comes with a cost Maybe I’m just tired of feeling so damn lost
Not feeling accepted has taken a toll on me
Devastation added on top of the underlying pain
Nothing I can do but sit holding no one accountable
What else would you expect me to do
I turn it all inside
Carrying all the burdens
Hiding all the shame
Running from the memories
At the end of the day I have no one to blame
It’s ok though because I know that pain
I feel invisible
Nothing to lose
Oh wait, that’s right
That’s when I get told I don’t have a clue
I wonder if I’ve ever really showed anyone who I really am
My broken pieces run far to deep
Inside my demons constantly keeping me from sleep
Continually re-victimized by the very same voices that keep feeding me lies
Just when I feel I can’t hold on one more day, it occurs to me that no one is coming to save me and it doesn’t even matter if I were to walk away
All the labels and judgment
Fill my ears
But again no one knows the shell of a woman standing in front of them
Too sensitive
Too bossy
Too picky
Too upset
Too cautious
Too angry
Too hurt
Too organized
Too right
Too wrong
Too isolated
Too weak
Too strong
Too emotional
Too tired
Too sexy
Too much
Too difficult
Too quiet
Too old
Too kind
Too loud
Too thoughtful
Too busy
Too hyper
Too complicated
Too Broken
Surrounded by all the voices
Seeming so intrigued
Fascinated by my words & wisdom
They like me
They love me
Oops once again I’ve been misled
They were only passing the time
And never again thought of me
Have you ever truly felt this alone?
https://braveandrecklessblog.com/2019/10/13/my-soul-to-keep-taylor-grace/
In the shadows
Forgotten peace
Silence, the thief
My soul to keep
Buried shame
Selfish needs
Lost time
Safety
Comfort
What I seek
Some days a domestic goddess, and other days a lost woman that still hasn’t bothered to brush her hair. My journey is full of life’s whimsical tales, love, laughter, heartache, trauma, passion, fantasy and everything in between. My writing is raw, sometimes too raw but I write it anyways, it’s my truth, my voice and I will share it. I’ve been described as honest, even complicated and have a whole lot of sassy undertones, so things get interesting, even comical at times. You can read more of my writing at The Broken Inside Me
Our journey may be different
Our needs evolve over time
Our wants fluctuate
Sometimes leaving behind troubled waters
Like the flow of the ocean, hard and consuming, it can leave us submerged
During the emotional storms we often struggle just to remain afloat
When the waters are calm and serene we sink blindly into the unknown dangers below the surface
This isn’t the way your life has to go
Our deep buried emotions can attempt to drown us temporarily or teach us to swim forever
The water, like our emotions, can be misleading
Our view can be distorted depending on where we currently stand
The terror is frightening if your desperately treading water in the sea
Alternatively
The warm, sweet, & blissful release of comfort and security is only realized once you make it to the beach
Realization crashing against the sand of our circumstance
It’s your journey
It’s your life, in your hands
Sometimes we need to reach out and that is where strength comes in
The weight of the ocean will only leave you treading water
That’s not a place you can sustain, only staying afloat until the weight of the pain is too intense
The ocean’s current below you working to pull you in, like the negativity you have deep within
So many are standing just on the sand, waiting, offering and willing to give you a hand
You only need to take that chance grab it
We each need assistance at some point
For someone to encourage, validate and tell us we can, we are and save us from drowning in the flood of emotions
Strength comes when you don’t have many other options, so let is save you
from life’s waves of high tides and sinking further in the lows.
xoxo
♥️me
7/14/2019
Thebrokeninsideofme.com
I was born into a life no child should ever have to experience.
I have never known a Father’s love but instead a Father’s rage, addiction, violence, and being sexually abused.
I was only 2 when he stole a bigger part of me.
I was too young & didn’t understand but was left feeling confused.
I was only 4 when he ripped me apart physically.
Years & years of laughter, love, & joy were not what would be in store for me.
Instead i have faced countless surgeries, unbearable pain and eventually heartbreaking infertility.
Through no fault of my own just another thing he took from me.
The physical scars have distorted my body.
But it’s the emotional wreckage that has continued to haunt me.
I often wonder what that little girl would have grown up to be.
If only she hadn’t been so viciously stolen from me.
She had no time for playtime, fairytales, hopes or dreams.
But instead staying alive & keeping her sanity would be her biggest priority.
You may think she is a survivor & how true that might be
But it certainly doesn’t feel that simple with the daily reminders & horrific memories.
I was only 7 when she abandoned me.
A mother’s love,that I did not see.
Where was my protector & biggest fan.
The person who was suppose to build me up & tell me I can.
Horribly failed me in the short time we had together.
I only wished that she could have loved me better.
What was so wrong with me that my own birth parents could cause so much damage & destruction.
Not stopping to think about how all this would forever affect me.
I continue today living through all the repercussions.
What a tragedy at how my life started off to be.
All because they put addiction, abuse, violence, wants & selfish needs first instead of me.
Years of therapy, doctors & medication could never replace the shattered pieces of my heart, soul & innocence that they have stolen from me.
No justice was served or consequence for them to bare
Although apart they live worry free
No second thought of the damage caused to me
It is my burden to bare, as they live their life vicariously
Wronged yet again through the system, and no justice will ever prevail for me.
The truth never hurts
Their lies disgusting
Unable to rewrite history
Validation arrives on shattered dreams
My truth, written for all eternity
§
xoxo
♥️me
Thebrokeninsideofme.com
◈
Racing against mystery
Shadows looming
Cautions of intensity
Unknown struggle
Surviving memories
Hunger for truth
Taste of victory
She will win the battle that no one knows she is facing
Setting her goals
Following her dreams
Led by conviction
Paving the path
No longer silenced
A WARRIOR
Achieving
Her fight against complex ptsd
The dark horse is me
◈
xoxo
♥️me
9/18/2019
Thebrokeninsideofme.com
