You don’t think it’s real

It’s fine

But don’t tell me how to feel

Minimize my pain

It’s fine

You are only adding to my shame

Point out all my flaws

It’s fine

I’m doing my best, oh wait I guess I’m a lost cause

I guess, forever alone is what I should be

It’s fine

I guess there’s no running from my destiny

Why take the time to inquire & listen to the brokeness that is me

It’s fine

And now hurt again despite taking years, I did let you in finally

Hold it all against me

It’s fine

Not like I had a choice to be beaten, starved, raped, tortured, held captive repeatly

You won’t ever understand me

It’s fine

If I could erase it all from my memory, I would but not for you, for my own sanity

All those years I didn’t learn

It’s fine

I guess now it’s too late to go back to take a different turn

You say I am no longer strong like I use to be

It’s fine

My strength is what lead me to the point of asking for help or I would cease to be

You have no idea and say I’m living a lie

It’s fine

Just once shut your mouth and try living one day thru my eyes

I have no friends, you’ve made that clear

It’s fine

I was just venting and wanted someone to just lend me an ear

My emotions are numb

It’s fine

I’ve always teetered between running & choking on a gun

I stuff the feelings deep down inside

It’s fine

It’s the only thing I learned other than to hide

Talking on the phone brings me intense anxiety

It’s fine

But you have wants and continue to care less about my emotional needs

Your temper is the go-to excuse

It’s fine

I’ll sit here reminded of what not to say next time, thanks to your clues

Two different people we are, I definitely agree

It’s fine

I just want to love, trust you and know you have my back 100% without feeling so much insanity

Not speaking a word, hopeless, shaking, exhausted, isolating, & heart still racing

It’s fine

At least With Complex PTSD I always know what I’m facing

You say we are at an impass

It’s fine

My heart is completely shattered but once again my feelings come last

Twist my words to suit you perfectly

It’s fine

I take the blame for the imperfect woman you see

We can’t move forward, go back in time or happily pretend life is great

It’s fine

Commitment has a way of twisting Love into feeling more like a trap

I doubt you took the time to actually read

It’s fine

No depth, reflection or understanding is what continues to feed the Broken Pieces that are Me

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